Sunday, January 10, 2016

Illustrated Short Stories for "Kids"..... :)

It would seem, that anyone who ever was once a child, has it in their head, that they can write childrens books/short stories. Well, since i was once a kid, I got to thinking, hell, I should be able to write a childrens short story...... So, here is my first in a series of "Illustrated Short Stories for Children.....   Poor Grandpa>.....
Grandpa is suffering, a bad case of gas

Farting and sputtering sounds right out of his ass…..
poor grandpa!
Though he suffers in silence, the poor old dear

The smell is excruciating, and is polluting the air…..
poor grandpa!
It isn’t because we don’t love him and want him close

But we’d all be better off, if he was comatose…..
poor grandpa!

Well, it’s been a few months that passed by

And poor old grandpa, well, didn’t he die…….

poor grandpa!
Grandpa we miss you, always quick with a zinger

Unfortunetly, that is the wrong finger………. 

I'm thinking my next childrens Short Story will be:
Grandma, Your Too Old for Those "Toys"

The Dangers of Peanut Butter........
Since I've decided to put together short stories for children, I thought maybe I should try and teach the little rugrats things that may help them through life.... I now present "the dangers of peanut butter"............ or, peanut butter can lead to sex........

dangers of peanut butter
Little Roy sure did like to eat

And peanut butter he thought was sweet…..

dangers of peanut butter

His mom would give him peanut butter each day

With his promise of being good and keep quiet and play…..

dangers of peanut butter

Little Roy got some peanut butter on his lap

And Found his dog loved it … and how, holy crap!

 dangers of peanut butter

Sadly, little roys dog up and died…..

Little roy, he cried and cried………

dangers of peanut butter
Looking out his window one summer day

His heart beat faster, and he began to sway
dangers of peanut butter
There was a pretty little girl next door

Maybe she’d like peanut butter like his dog did before….

Yup, peanut butter can be dangerous, and lead to sex................. always wear a condom before using peanut butter........