Friday, March 13, 2015

Of Snoring,Wrinkles, Sleep and more............

   So I went into bed. The wife had went 10 minutes before me. As I reached the bedroom door, there was a sound much like I would think a cat drowning in oatmeal would sound like. Yes it was the wife snoring. That is just so wrong. That sound, and plus how the hell does anyone fall asleep that fast? 

   I remember watching cartoons, one particular of Fred Flintstone sleeping. He was snoring away, and with every exhale, the bed covers would fall, and with every inhale, they would come back up. I was actually expecting to see the very same thing, when I entered the room.

   Well, I didn't, but I did manage to piss the wife off when I woke her up. She asked why, and I told her if she continued the way she was going, I wasn't sure if I'd have to apply CPR or mouth to mouth resuscitation! She wasn't amused, but I sure as hell was! 

   I have never heard myself snore, so I have to assume I don't, even though the wife says I do, but it seems only on those occasions I have had a few more cocktails than I should have. I take a very long time to fall asleep. It seems when I crawl into bed, so does all the things I have had on my mind all day. So I lay there problem solving till my eyes won't stay open any longer. I usually get 4 to 5 hours sleep a night, sometimes less. In those few hours, I make 2 or 3 trips to take a leak. I have bags under my eyes that look like worn out luggage.

   Now my wife, she has smooth skin, only a few very fine wrinkles (she calls them laugh lines) and she looks just as good without make-up as she does with it......Which surprises me, because over the last several years, this woman has had several operations and deals with pain on a daily basis. I have no idea how she does it, and neither does she...cause I've asked her.  

   I wish I could figure it all out, cause I'm thinking there is money to be made there somehow. Then I wouldn't have to rely on my poorly made retirement plans..... winning the lottery! 

Below shows  why there are no Dinosaurs left..... I like to educate as well as entertain!





5 comments:

  1. You probably do snore if your wife says you do. You just don't hear it because by the time you do fall asleep you are so tired nothing would wake you up :-)

    LOL@ that video !!

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  2. @Lia Storm nope, I don't snore! :) Besides, I'm a light sleeper, if I made that noise, I'd wake up! :) :) :)

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  3. I don’t get up in the middle of the night...I just pee the bed....then the smell keeps my mouth shut so I don’t snore

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  4. @Charles Hobbs nope, ain't doing that! :)

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